I am dedicating this to my wonderful husband, my 4 beautiful daughters and my heavenly son "AJ" and also our newest addition Colt. This is a place for me to share my/our journey. I am a wife, a working mom, and a grieving parent.
Yesterday... April 27 was just NOT another day in the year and will never be just a another day to us. It is a sacred day. A year ago my family and those near and close to us, our lives were changed forever!!! My/Our son passed away to SIDS. Every parents nightmare was my/our reality!!! My/Our heart broke. We had our son Acea Jack "AJ" here with us for 2 months and 27 wonderful days!!! Every moment my heart aches and longs for him. He brought me, my husband and his sisters JOY!!!
A year ago...I walked into my nightmare.
Remembering back a year ago, it is a blurr. Such anguish, pain and heartache. Instead of finishing planning AJ's baby blessing at church, We had to plan his funeral services. I hated doing that process last year. I felt inspiration at one point that AJ wanted his small life shared big. All of a sudden thoughts were pouring out of me of how AJ enjoyed his time and what he did. We made note cards stating all these thoughts...His earthly memories were shared.
From that moment of losing my/our little AJ...We have been taught so many lessons of Eternal Families, Faith, Joy, Love, Service, Christ's greatest gift of the Atonement and many more....
This year we spent this sacred day by Paul and I spending time at the Temple for the morning, Paul and I hung out together, we went to the cemetery to send balloons to AJ to play with, we ate doughnut "Halos", had family pictures taken and had dinner as a family.
Only another grieving parent can understand this lifelong heartache....
I tell people, "my heart is being stitched back together. My heart will always have a scar on it".
Thank you to friends and family; that have called, brought meals over, Listened and cried with me/us, and being there when not even asked.